Thursday, 22 December 2011

Auguries of the Winter Solstice

A dear friend of mine's birthday falls on the winter solstice.  Every year, I usually send him a text message with something witty or poetic, but this year, he went down south with his gf, so his phone's probably not functional over there. I instead decided to send him an email, and I ended up writing a poem! I had fun with it, so I figure it would be a waste if I didn't share it with others too.

It recounts the day I had on the 21st-- it was supposed to be an evening of 'break' from all the plushie-madness I've been going through... but in the end, it was so friggin' stressful and I felt completely awful!  But writing about it seemed to cheer me up a little bit, so here it goes:

Auguries of the winter solstice

I humbly apologize that this is one day late,
But yesterday I endured a rather poor fate.
The solstice was glum, wet, yet still freezing
Roads spelled danger, cold rain left me wheezing.

T’was first the fuckin’ 201 that never showed face.
I waited and wept in the wind’s icy embrace.
After more than an hour, I finally left the west,
Fighting against my fate, I would salvage the rest.

6PM had passed, but a mall was open to my delight
I needed flowers, for a circus friend’s show that night.
Curtains opened at eight, so I had much time to kill
I went to the MAC, art was always my best thrill.

Yet the exhibit was boring and not quite to my taste
There was still more time, so I travelled without haste
To the theatre I went, holding a bouquet of flowers,
Like a poetic young man with a date in a few hours.

But seriously, a bouquet can create a dramatic effect
To whom she gives them, will they accept or reject?
Or perhaps, since she’s female, they were given to her,
A gift from a boyfriend, or from a secret admirer.

With this cumbersome object, I sat and watched the show
My friend shined bright, her performance an ephemeral glow
Nostalgia crept up, to a distant past of seven years prior
Dreams of flying, my heart blazed with passionate desire.

When it came to an end, I waited in the lobby like I was told
Throngs completely vanished, until I was the only left on hold
But 11PM drew near, and I could stand no more
That cursed 201 would await me just like before.

I left the empty theatre under the dangerous freezing rain,
With a clenching fist, I chucked the flowers to a nearby drain
If I could cry like the pellets falling from the sky
I would, but I couldn’t, since my heart was long dry

I hope that your fate on this day was the opposite of mine
Hot weather, warm company, and lots of fine wine.
I wonder if you have that belly that Tania could only wish
And that you’re basking in joy, without a trace of anguish.

So in this awful wretched world often devoid of mirth,
Cheers to you, for surviving yet another year since birth.

Additional Notes:
201-- one of the buses I have to take; it comes every 40 minutes, and sometimes it decides not to come at all!
west- I'm from the 'west island' of montreal
MAC- montreal museum of contemporary art
dreams of flying- I used to do aerial circus arts

So basically, there was this circus artist friend that I haven't seen in like 6 years. I thought it was important that I bring her flowers, as a congratulation of success.  I went through so much hassle getting there early, I aimed to get there before 6PM because it was a wednesday and most malls closed at that time, but I found this one that closed at 9PM, so I could still get flowers.

I had loads of time to kill, so I went to the MAC, all the while carrying this bouquet.  Honestly, if you want to feel poetic, carry flowers in public. It's an interesting experience.

In hindsight, I was having a date with myself. LOL. Oh, but I didn't eat dinner by myself (in fact, I ate before leaving the house)...but if I did, then the date would be complete.

Anyways, so after the show, I stood in the lobby where my friend told me to wait, and that she would be down in 10~15 minutes (she had emailed me this the night before). I waited for 40, and finally had to leave or else I would miss my last 201 bus, and there was no way I'd make it alive walking in freezing rain (which is an hour walk if I don't catch that bus).

So after all that hassle of getting those damn flowers, and after walking around with them, sitting in the theater with that cumbersome object, waiting in the lobby while the crowds dissapeared, like a stubborn mule or a stood-up date, I finally left and chucked the bouquet by the threshold of a random building.

And because of all this wait, I wouldn't be able to hitch a ride from my bro (but if I left the theater when the show was done, I would have). So all in all, it was just bad timing from everything, and I froze my ass off once again.

I don't know if I create drama or if it chases me. I must be the one creating it, by my actions or choices...either way, I hate it.  So the winter kicks off with quite the horrible start! But I still have hope for 2012, and I'll continue to fight agaisnt my fate.

1 comment:

  1. Oh Jess, you and your stories!! You seem to have a lot going on all the time, I wouldn't necessarily call it drama, just..unfortunate circumstances maybe. The only thing you can do is keep fighting! :) I can't relate, but I'll always be here to read your story! I loved your poem, it was touching and a little whimsical/quirky at the same time (sorry I'm crap at describing properly..) I myself would have loved to receive a special poem on my birthday lol :D